Welcome to Florida, a place where a meth-addicted couple stole a motorized handicap cart from Walmart and drove it down the highway because they didn’t feel like walking to the bar; where a man beat his boyfriend nearly to death with a singing bass fish after arguing about what to have for dinner; where a cemetery groundskeeper called the police because he thought one of the corpses had climbed out of their grave; where the mall Easter Bunny beat the crap out of a kid for bullying another boy; a place where Floridaman and Floridawoman roam free.